[Osx-nutters] "As mad as cheese"

[Stefano Mori]

Every now and then I'm reminded that I'm a foreigner; what does this  
expression mean? I enquire of Nutters. Is it that 'cheese' is somehow  
very mad? Insanely mad? Exuberantly mad? I don't understand. Perhaps  
the opposite, I wonder; is it a rebuttal? That cheese is perfectly  
sane, even reserved, in the way that it quietly sits in the fridge,  
waiting to be eaten. Or does it depend on the type of cheese? Are we  
to presume that Camembert is the painter's choice of surreal cheesy  
delusions? And Emmental has the crazy "you pay for cheese but we gave  
you empty air" thing? A choice of cheese that is not quite as bad as  
gross delusions but nonetheless illogical. Meanwhile, do we maintain  
that a good firm Cheddar is, by comparison, hearty and reliable? A  
veritable "cheesy" cheese (as my wife often calls it). "I don't like  
this Manchego, for it is not a cheesy cheese", she will say. How I  
quiver and hesitate before the cheese counter; all those cheeses, but  
which ones are really cheesy? I pick the one that is a little softer,  
hedging my bets that if it fails to impress it will not hurt my  
knobbin when my wife throws it at me. And come to think of it, just  
how do they get all those different kinds of cheeses from just one  
species, the cow? And how do sheep feel about this? I note the  
sheep's meagre representation in the cheese counter. No fancy names,  
no regional specialities, no variety of colour, taste, and texture to  
compare with the mighty cow. I start to feel for the sheep, and a new  
expression comes to mind; "As envious as sheep".

Stefano